Love Me Tinder

Today’s online perusing for a date may seem rather easy and efficient, albeit impersonal. From the comfort of your couch, watching TV with a glass of wine, you can swipe through hundreds of potential mates on apps like Tinder … What a modern, convenient and advanced way of selecting your next potential love interest. Gone are the days of meeting someone in a loud, crowded and unfriendly bar where you have to actually put effort into drawing another into conversation. But how one gets chosen on these dating sites may actually be more primitive than we want to believe.

You have seconds to impress your potential partner, and most men and women are not privy to what the opposite sex is even looking for. In fact, most women do not realize the picture they’re using is actually reducing their chances of getting selected. Take for instance the “silly fake mustache picture” used to show your fun side. Most men view that as “too masculine” thus, a turn off! Or what about the ideal angle picture? You know the one to show you have a perfectly angular face. Well guess what, if you’re not positioned just right, you’ll end up with larger looking shoulders, a wider lower third portion of your face, and an unfavorable chin tilt. We live in a time where point, click and share no longer exist. Who would have thought taking a picture would be so stressful?

Since online dating is all based on first impressions, those that provide the most evidence appealing to the opposite sex are more likely to get chosen. However, there is still something missing from these sites that could help determine if your match is for a night, or a lifetime.

We may know it as basic chemistry, but it really boils down to pheromones. You know those curious subconscious odors we all emit that reveal our genetic codes and more. In fact, everything from our fertility, health, hormone status and possibly even our intent can be hinted in our odors. For over 3.5 million years, humans have become incredibly adept at finding and selecting their ideal mate. And first impressions are critical to that process. So you see, when a website only provides a photo representation, it’s missing the chemistry component, which is more than just admiring what your eyes see. To go the distance you and your mate will have to have a pheromone connection as well!

To learn more on how to put your best face forward on a dating site or to learn more about how to use your physical, mental and hormonal assets to appeal to the opposite sex you can read my New York Times best-seller, Subliminally Exposed. Tell us what you think on Facebook! If you have a question for Dr. Steven Dayan, please email myclinicalteam@drdayan.com with the subject “Question for Dr. Dayan”